Monday 11 October 2021

Being small

Being small.

I have pondered the challenge of very small breakthroughs being the way of "the kingdom of God". I was reminded of a belief I held more strongly before, lying dormant perhaps during some terribly-low times, that all glory (and "crowns" etc) are to be returned to the Source. 

But WHAT a challenge for someone if their sense of self-confidence has hit all time lows? If they are shown gratitude or some small honour, can they give up that scrap when they are dying of self-esteem starvation? Maybe that is the point, Jesus doesn’t want us to think in terms of scraps of food. Or keep us in a posture of a beggar: please appreciate the thing I did and make me feel special for a few seconds!

From the perspective of how our sense of self-confidence and our security within relationships, giving back the scrap of honour to God and others might actually constitute a more satisfying and enduring internal meal. It really might be worth, then, not taking full credit! 

Mark 4:30 is the famous mustard seed metaphorical story, it speaks to me in fresh ways about being small and a deeper, more fulfilling and longer-term sense of being visible and useful. It takes a lot of time. I'm not there yet. Each time I try to jump at the getting-recognised thing it just has me whooshing back to the start-line, like a giant game of snakes and ladders!

Give credit, my soul, and be well.
Image: https://stevesbiblemeditations.com/2013/12/12/casting-crowns-revelation-49-11/